Living the art of contentment

Santosha, in Sanskrit, means contentment or satisfaction.

This word has come into my life twice in the past couple of weeks, mostly in yoga classes, but also in the back of my mind.

In my world, this word translates to the overall contentment, understanding and radical acceptance of your current situation. Regardless of what happened that day, what was said or done in the past, whatever is coming up on the horizon—it’s all ok and how it’s supposed to be.

But how could the average person just accept the fact that everything that’s wrong in the world is fine as is?

I like to consider myself a very “chill” person in all facets of life, but what’s been bugging me the most lately is how hard it’s been to get a job.

If you know me in real life, you’d think I’d be thriving in all of this freedom. And not to say that’s not true, but more than a steady paycheck, I miss writing, working on projects, and meeting with my designers every week.

There are moments when I feel a little brainwashed by our hustle culture. Especially when I think about the family connectedness I experienced while traveling abroad. Since our early years of school, the number one question asked was always, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”

My answer (before I decided to become a professional writer) was a marine biologist. (I know, so weird, right?)

My answer never was, “I want to be glued in (and honestly controlled) by my laptop jumping from one meeting to another solving content problems that should have been fixed in other ways.”

So when I think about my inner child’s dream career, it still kinda makes sense. I wanted to be out on the open waters, under the sun, learning things about a life I had never known. Using my hands to discover new stuff and study how and why things changed.

I’ve been unemployed now for almost a year. In my time off, I’ve traveled Asia and reconnected with family. I have memories that I’ll carry through for years to come.

Back on the mainland, I’ve reconnected with friends and family. I’ve settled into a life that isn’t full of dining out at fancy places or filling my days with random things to do.

I sit at home and rested. I take my dogs on daily walks when I’m staying in San Diego. I volunteer at my local food bank when I live in Washington. I’ve planted things in our garden. I go on walks and talk to trees, dogs and myself.

I found things that made me utterly happy, without spending money.

My situation is the best it could be. I thankfully don’t panic about a lack of money. Although money and income can be a stressor, I’ve found ways to lean on others—or even find free things to do—to keep my mind occupied and content. My family and partner have done an amazing job at making me feel that everything in the end will all turn out ok.

That state of mind—that peace of mind—is what’s bringing ease into my life right now. And that sensation is absolutely priceless.

It’s summer time here in the states and I’m used to spending a fuck-ton of cash to travel and adventure out in the world. But I can’t tell you how content I’ve felt just resting at home with my dogs, or watching movies with my little brother, or just visiting with the people in my life.

There have been moments this past year when I asked myself, “What on earth am I supposed to be doing right now if I don’t have a steady job?” I haven’t figured it out completely, but there is happiness in enjoying your own home space, laying on the floor and cuddling your animals, and getting your hands dirty with yard work.

I know this time won’t last forever. I know 1000% that I will land a job that I absolutely love. But for now, I’m bathing in the contentment that all is completely fine.